I felt refreshed and listened inside myself. I could tell that I realised all that little details, wich passed my life. All that little "holding up’s of coppers in the sun just to see if they would have the size of the whole warming planet and would it be worth using it. All that “I’m waiting under an apple tree and watch the leaves falling and if there are more than ten of them in exactly thirty minutes, she wouldn’t come”. Because all of that is just a chain of connected points and if one point is changing all of them going to be disordered. Or none of all that is going to change. Who could tell if there is a master plan or isn’t. But in the end it isn’t important. I’m not the one who’s looking back to tell if there was a point in doing something different, I’m not the one who is charging himself for what he did or what he’s doing. All I wanna emphasize is to look for the detail, too keep an eye on the little things and don’t be afraid when from time to time the feeling overwhelms you that it would be not important. Importance is a word which only can bother yourself, it doesn’t threat to you or to anyone I know, just to myself.


Right, it’s three o’clock in the morning, I got all the ingredients to bake an apple pie and I’m doing it right now. Maybe it’s the joint I smoked or the receipt which is hanging for ages in front of me, or that feeling of hunger which is hurting my stomach since I left my theatre, anyway I’m gonna eat it and not use it, therefore it can’t be at least a sexual reason.


But in the end I wanna chew the landscape of my life and form little islands to which I could swim or go by boat to stay there until an idea flies over of another island and makes the surface change like the surface of a cookie in a strong rain. It’s just left to say, that I’m hoping that I wouldn’t sit in the car which is hiting the cookie without noticing it. I prefere standing aside the road, feel the mud in my face and watch satisfied the moment a poor bastard leaving his life passing by without even realizing. I might yell at him. “Leave your safety little squaremetre and touch what you hit, you little dump.” But he probably isn’t able to hear me, because the window is still closed. In that case I’m staying calme because I’m not the man who’s breaking others opinions and risk a judgement. In that case narzism is my buddy on the way.



Left to say: the whole is a puzzle of details and the most uninteresting thing I ever saw, is a finished puzzle work on a wall in a frame


Me and you and everyone we know